Recovery Beyond Guilt & Shame
By jona bryndis, Mar 19 2017 09:47AM
As humans, we have the need for communication and interaction with others. There’s something in the mirroring that soothes us, that reflects to us that we are here, we exist, and that it is ok. But what if our interaction with others is blocked through a deep feeling, that we are not good enough or worthy; that we have nothing offer; or worse, that there is no point in even trying? We feel in shame of even existing and guilty for not being abale to do better than that.
For many of us, the inability to be intimate with others can become quite painful and something we come to regret. We may realize that much of what gives meaning to life is passing us by as we observe from the sidelines. Whenever our basic needs are not met, or the pain of dealing with our reality becomes too overwhemeling, it requires us to resort to our conditioned coping behaviors, be it to distract, numb the pain, or get our needs met. Options are many but common are victimhood, substance use, gambling, materialism, extreme risk, pornography, control and sex - and so we get stuck in an ever repeating cycle of shame, guilt, separation, pain, coping, and shame and guilt again...
What energy in us can be so strong that it can keep us from opening up and expressing ourselves - dismissing our most basic need to to connect with others and isolate ourselves ?
Besides classic recovery treatment and therapies which can help us with overcoming the outer layer of our addictions, I would like to invite you to take a look at how Energy Work can provide the missing link that can show us new ways out of our guilt and shame cycle and how to address often misunderstood human wound to regain a more healhty and fulfilling outlook on life.
When we look at guilt and shame from an energetic perspective, we can identify that we are at the low end of the range that we can experience as human. Being in a state of Shame represents an extremely low level of life force energy availble to us and thus disable us from taking any positive steps toward change. If dominant and persistent, this state may bring us to question the point of continuing life at all, regardless of what may be around the next corner. The belief may come, that we are simply unworthy of the life experience, that we are not good enough. We can find ourselves absent of any faith or hope that there may come a better day.
This is the extreme of course, but even at lesser degrees, the energetic state of shame and its associated feeling of guilt can significantly affect the quality of our lives. A common behavior, if we are in shame or guilt, is to withdraw, either physically or energetically, in part because of the discomfort and amplification of these feelings when in the presence of others. If we are forced or make choice to not be alone, we may express only a minimal fragment of what we truly are, if at all, and are often unable or unwilling to participate or interact with any meaning or intimacy.
There’s no question that guilt and shame can bind us in numerous areas in life, but they also appear in another role if we happen to find ourselves becoming dependent or in an addictive relationship with any of our coping behaviors and get caught in a repeating cycle, one that we’ve sworn to stop. There’s a place in this cycle, soon after our will power has once again failed, and we’ve repeated the undesired or destructive behavior, that the pain of remorse, guilt and shame jump right in and start demanding they be soothed. Where do you suppose, this may try to lead us to look for comfort? So, we begin again.
What can we do and how can energy work help?
It’s widely agreed that guilt is the feeling that we experience when we believe we’ve done something wrong, perhaps against our own moral standards or imposed upon us by others, according to their standards, which may have been inappropriate but accepted by us regardless, maybe due to being at a vulnerable age for example.
Guilt can also be energetically passed down through generations so its source may never be known to us. Some alleviation of guilt can often be found in making note of things in memory that continue to bother us and if possible, making amends where needed. If we are unable to set things right, we accept our human error and Let Go of the situation as one of those things that we cannot change.
Some of us will find need to go further back in our history, perhaps to our earliest years of life, to find true, lasting resolution. We might also find it beneficial to look for something positive, perhaps a spiritual teaching, within the experience, to further shift our perspective. Of course, if current behaviors are a source of recurring guilt, we must look for a positive replacement.
Shame stems from the belief that there is something wrong with us, that we are faulty, and is the most challenging of the two to move beyond. This goes to the core of our worth as human and often appears as total absence of Self-Love. This too, could be a result of messages we’ve told ourselves, those from others, or inherited. For some resolution, in our daily lives, we can direct our awareness to the internal messages we tell ourselves and our daily actions. Where do we find things that support the belief that we are faulty? What can we change or replace to counteract the messages? Let’s start now.
The essence of energetic recovery work is the healing of all blockages that prevent us from being who we truly are and who we can become in our healing process. In continual integration of our recovered inner connection we not only further increase our conscious experience of self-love, but also elevate our vibratory rate into enhanced states of consciousness that promote inner self-healing.
The purpose of addressing guilt and shame cycles through energy work is in allowing a gentle inner reframing, shifting of perspective, or Letting Go process bypassing our mental and emotional attachment to our pain. Through the deep internalization of what it can feel like to be worthy and free of guilt/shame the energy session can assist us in moving forward from a perspective of acceptance of ourselves again - an energetic state that can activate our innate self-healing and lead to ever-increasing Self-Love.
A specifically developed remote energy process can assist us greatly in this as the resulting field will again support heart connection to our Inner Higher Power, within which we are able to align to a number of faster vibrational frequencies and shift into a perspective of that of observer, instead of the experiencer of our lives. This allows for much to be transcended and released without the intense emotion that one might anticipate.
The presence of and our alignment to some of these faster resonances like Acceptance, Understanding, Compassion, Forgiveness, and Unconditional Love, for example, can help us greatly in finally moving beyond some of the issues that may have cluttered our paths for years.
If you are interested in find out more, click here for details on how to participate in such an energy session here at transCODES.
To read more about energetic recovery work click here.
Recovery Energy Coach, Certified transCOACH & Founder of