Our defensive structure and coping methods of the ego were developed initially to find ways to deal with pain, fear, suffering, and even trauma. They were the response given to protect our vulnerable nature (the True Self), and keep us in a perceived state of safety, accepted, even loved.
With time, these restrictive methods blossomed through repetition into very complex, multilayered programs geared at keeping that very open and hurt part of us hidden, restricted, lost or even simply denied. This of course works for many without feeling the need change; however, a smaller percentage of us feel the frustration of denying part of themselves or their expression, which leads to seeking change, introspection and even an active search for ways to change.
For most, this entails shunning or denying our shadow at first as we try ‘to get rid of it,’ which only increases the restriction and adds layers to our ego’s methodology. This can bring about even more frustration, doubt, and judgment of just how bad we are creating a vicious cycle that just keeps adding to the ego.